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VOLUME[ PART 2  ]  

CHAPTER[ LII. WHEREIN IS RELATED THE ADVENTURE OF THE SECOND DISTRESSED OR AFFLICTED

DUENNA, OTHERWISE CALLED DONA RODRIGUEZ

Cide Hamete relates that Don Quixote being now cured of his scratches

felt that the life he was leading in the castle was entirely inconsistent

with the order of chivalry he professed, so he determined to ask the duke

and duchess to permit him to take his departure for Saragossa, as the

time of the festival was now drawing near, and he hoped to win there the

suit of armour which is the prize at festivals of the sort. But one day

at table with the duke and duchess, just as he was about to carry his

resolution into effect and ask for their permission, lo and behold

suddenly there came in through the door of the great hall two women, as

they afterwards proved to be, draped in mourning from head to foot, one

of whom approaching Don Quixote flung herself at full length at his feet,

pressing her lips to them, and uttering moans so sad, so deep, and so

doleful that she put all who heard and saw her into a state of

perplexity; and though the duke and duchess supposed it must be some joke

their servants were playing off upon Don Quixote, still the earnest way

the woman sighed and moaned and wept puzzled them and made them feel

uncertain, until Don Quixote, touched with compassion, raised her up and

made her unveil herself and remove the mantle from her tearful face. She

complied and disclosed what no one could have ever anticipated, for she

disclosed the countenance of Dona Rodriguez, the duenna of the house; the

other female in mourning being her daughter, who had been made a fool of

by the rich farmer's son. All who knew her were filled with astonishment,

and the duke and duchess more than any; for though they thought her a

simpleton and a weak creature, they did not think her capable of crazy

pranks. Dona Rodriguez, at length, turning to her master and mistress

said to them, "Will your excellences be pleased to permit me to speak to

this gentleman for a moment, for it is requisite I should do so in order

to get successfully out of the business in which the boldness of an

evil-minded clown has involved me?"

The duke said that for his part he gave her leave, and that she might

speak with Senor Don Quixote as much as she liked.

She then, turning to Don Quixote and addressing herself to him said,

"Some days since, valiant knight, I gave you an account of the injustice

and treachery of a wicked farmer to my dearly beloved daughter, the

unhappy damsel here before you, and you promised me to take her part and

right the wrong that has been done her; but now it has come to my hearing

that you are about to depart from this castle in quest of such fair

adventures as God may vouchsafe to you; therefore, before you take the

road, I would that you challenge this froward rustic, and compel him to

marry my daughter in fulfillment of the promise he gave her to become her

husband before he seduced her; for to expect that my lord the duke will

do me justice is to ask pears from the elm tree, for the reason I stated

privately to your worship; and so may our Lord grant you good health and

forsake us not."

To these words Don Quixote replied very gravely and solemnly, "Worthy

duenna, check your tears, or rather dry them, and spare your sighs, for I

take it upon myself to obtain redress for your daughter, for whom it

would have been better not to have been so ready to believe lovers'

promises, which are for the most part quickly made and very slowly

performed; and so, with my lord the duke's leave, I will at once go in

quest of this inhuman youth, and will find him out and challenge him and

slay him, if so be he refuses to keep his promised word; for the chief

object of my profession is to spare the humble and chastise the proud; I

mean, to help the distressed and destroy the oppressors."

"There is no necessity," said the duke, "for your worship to take the

trouble of seeking out the rustic of whom this worthy duenna complains,

nor is there any necessity, either, for asking my leave to challenge him;

for I admit him duly challenged, and will take care that he is informed

of the challenge, and accepts it, and comes to answer it in person to

this castle of mine, where I shall afford to both a fair field, observing

all the conditions which are usually and properly observed in such

trials, and observing too justice to both sides, as all princes who offer

a free field to combatants within the limits of their lordships are bound

to do."

"Then with that assurance and your highness's good leave," said Don

Quixote, "I hereby for this once waive my privilege of gentle blood, and

come down and put myself on a level with the lowly birth of the

wrong-doer, making myself equal with him and enabling him to enter into

combat with me; and so, I challenge and defy him, though absent, on the

plea of his malfeasance in breaking faith with this poor damsel, who was

a maiden and now by his misdeed is none; and say that he shall fulfill

the promise he gave her to become her lawful husband, or else stake his

life upon the question."

And then plucking off a glove he threw it down in the middle of the hall,

and the duke picked it up, saying, as he had said before, that he

accepted the challenge in the name of his vassal, and fixed six days

thence as the time, the courtyard of the castle as the place, and for

arms the customary ones of knights, lance and shield and full armour,

with all the other accessories, without trickery, guile, or charms of any

sort, and examined and passed by the judges of the field. "But first of

all," he said, "it is requisite that this worthy duenna and unworthy

damsel should place their claim for justice in the hands of Don Quixote;

for otherwise nothing can be done, nor can the said challenge be brought

to a lawful issue."

"I do so place it," replied the duenna.

"And I too," added her daughter, all in tears and covered with shame and

confusion.

This declaration having been made, and the duke having settled in his own

mind what he would do in the matter, the ladies in black withdrew, and

the duchess gave orders that for the future they were not to be treated

as servants of hers, but as lady adventurers who came to her house to

demand justice; so they gave them a room to themselves and waited on them

as they would on strangers, to the consternation of the other

women-servants, who did not know where the folly and imprudence of Dona

Rodriguez and her unlucky daughter would stop.

And now, to complete the enjoyment of the feast and bring the dinner to a

satisfactory end, lo and behold the page who had carried the letters and

presents to Teresa Panza, the wife of the governor Sancho, entered the

hall; and the duke and duchess were very well pleased to see him, being

anxious to know the result of his journey; but when they asked him the

page said in reply that he could not give it before so many people or in

a few words, and begged their excellences to be pleased to let it wait

for a private opportunity, and in the meantime amuse themselves with

these letters; and taking out the letters he placed them in the duchess's

hand. One bore by way of address, Letter for my lady the Duchess

So-and-so, of I don't know where; and the other To my husband Sancho

Panza, governor of the island of Barataria, whom God prosper longer than

me. The duchess's bread would not bake, as the saying is, until she had

read her letter; and having looked over it herself and seen that it might

be read aloud for the duke and all present to hear, she read out as

follows.

TERESA PANZA'S LETTER TO THE DUCHESS.

The letter your highness wrote me, my lady, gave me great pleasure, for

indeed I found it very welcome. The string of coral beads is very fine,

and my husband's hunting suit does not fall short of it. All this village

is very much pleased that your ladyship has made a governor of my good

man Sancho; though nobody will believe it, particularly the curate, and

Master Nicholas the barber, and the bachelor Samson Carrasco; but I don't

care for that, for so long as it is true, as it is, they may all say what

they like; though, to tell the truth, if the coral beads and the suit had

not come I would not have believed it either; for in this village

everybody thinks my husband a numskull, and except for governing a flock

of goats, they cannot fancy what sort of government he can be fit for.

God grant it, and direct him according as he sees his children stand in

need of it. I am resolved with your worship's leave, lady of my soul, to

make the most of this fair day, and go to Court to stretch myself at ease

in a coach, and make all those I have envying me already burst their eyes

out; so I beg your excellence to order my husband to send me a small

trifle of money, and to let it be something to speak of, because one's

expenses are heavy at the Court; for a loaf costs a real, and meat thirty

maravedis a pound, which is beyond everything; and if he does not want me

to go let him tell me in time, for my feet are on the fidgets to be off;

and my friends and neighbours tell me that if my daughter and I make a

figure and a brave show at Court, my husband will come to be known far

more by me than I by him, for of course plenty of people will ask, "Who

are those ladies in that coach?" and some servant of mine will answer,

"The wife and daughter of Sancho Panza, governor of the island of

Barataria;" and in this way Sancho will become known, and I'll be thought

well of, and "to Rome for everything." I am as vexed as vexed can be that

they have gathered no acorns this year in our village; for all that I

send your highness about half a peck that I went to the wood to gather

and pick out one by one myself, and I could find no bigger ones; I wish

they were as big as ostrich eggs.

Let not your high mightiness forget to write to me; and I will take care

to answer, and let you know how I am, and whatever news there may be in

this place, where I remain, praying our Lord to have your highness in his

keeping and not to forget me.

Sancha my daughter, and my son, kiss your worship's hands.

She who would rather see your ladyship than write to you,

Your servant,

TERESA PANZA.

All were greatly amused by Teresa Panza's letter, but particularly the

duke and duchess; and the duchess asked Don Quixote's opinion whether

they might open the letter that had come for the governor, which she

suspected must be very good. Don Quixote said that to gratify them he

would open it, and did so, and found that it ran as follows.

TERESA PANZA'S LETTER TO HER HUSBAND SANCHO PANZA.

I got thy letter, Sancho of my soul, and I promise thee and swear as a

Catholic Christian that I was within two fingers' breadth of going mad I

was so happy. I can tell thee, brother, when I came to hear that thou

wert a governor I thought I should have dropped dead with pure joy; and

thou knowest they say sudden joy kills as well as great sorrow; and as

for Sanchica thy daughter, she leaked from sheer happiness. I had before

me the suit thou didst send me, and the coral beads my lady the duchess

sent me round my neck, and the letters in my hands, and there was the

bearer of them standing by, and in spite of all this I verily believed

and thought that what I saw and handled was all a dream; for who could

have thought that a goatherd would come to be a governor of islands? Thou

knowest, my friend, what my mother used to say, that one must live long

to see much; I say it because I expect to see more if I live longer; for

I don't expect to stop until I see thee a farmer of taxes or a collector

of revenue, which are offices where, though the devil carries off those

who make a bad use of them, still they make and handle money. My lady the

duchess will tell thee the desire I have to go to the Court; consider the

matter and let me know thy pleasure; I will try to do honour to thee by

going in a coach.

Neither the curate, nor the barber, nor the bachelor, nor even the

sacristan, can believe that thou art a governor, and they say the whole

thing is a delusion or an enchantment affair, like everything belonging

to thy master Don Quixote; and Samson says he must go in search of thee

and drive the government out of thy head and the madness out of Don

Quixote's skull; I only laugh, and look at my string of beads, and plan

out the dress I am going to make for our daughter out of thy suit. I sent

some acorns to my lady the duchess; I wish they had been gold. Send me

some strings of pearls if they are in fashion in that island. Here is the

news of the village; La Berrueca has married her daughter to a

good-for-nothing painter, who came here to paint anything that might turn

up. The council gave him an order to paint his Majesty's arms over the

door of the town-hall; he asked two ducats, which they paid him in

advance; he worked for eight days, and at the end of them had nothing

painted, and then said he had no turn for painting such trifling things;

he returned the money, and for all that has married on the pretence of

being a good workman; to be sure he has now laid aside his paint-brush

and taken a spade in hand, and goes to the field like a gentleman. Pedro

Lobo's son has received the first orders and tonsure, with the intention

of becoming a priest. Minguilla, Mingo Silvato's granddaughter, found it

out, and has gone to law with him on the score of having given her

promise of marriage. Evil tongues say she is with child by him, but he

denies it stoutly. There are no olives this year, and there is not a drop

of vinegar to be had in the whole village. A company of soldiers passed

through here; when they left they took away with them three of the girls

of the village; I will not tell thee who they are; perhaps they will come

back, and they will be sure to find those who will take them for wives

with all their blemishes, good or bad. Sanchica is making bonelace; she

earns eight maravedis a day clear, which she puts into a moneybox as a

help towards house furnishing; but now that she is a governor's daughter

thou wilt give her a portion without her working for it. The fountain in

the plaza has run dry. A flash of lightning struck the gibbet, and I wish

they all lit there. I look for an answer to this, and to know thy mind

about my going to the Court; and so, God keep thee longer than me, or as

long, for I would not leave thee in this world without me.

Thy wife,

TERESA PANZA.

The letters were applauded, laughed over, relished, and admired; and

then, as if to put the seal to the business, the courier arrived,

bringing the one Sancho sent to Don Quixote, and this, too, was read out,

and it raised some doubts as to the governor's simplicity. The duchess

withdrew to hear from the page about his adventures in Sancho's village,

which he narrated at full length without leaving a single circumstance

unmentioned. He gave her the acorns, and also a cheese which Teresa had

given him as being particularly good and superior to those of Tronchon.

The duchess received it with greatest delight, in which we will leave

her, to describe the end of the government of the great Sancho Panza,

flower and mirror of all governors of islands.

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